Unclean, unclean!

I never claimed to be the worst mother, but some day I hope to get that award!

About a week ago Ian started complaining of an itchy scalp.  Being a super sensitive, eczema, contact dermatitis kind of girl, I was first worried about the new laundry detergent that I bought and washed his sheets in.  Okay, easy fix!
1 trip to the store later- clean and free of dyes and chemicals, super friendly laundry detergent, sheets washed, towels too!

Next day- Itchy scalp. 
Ahh, he just has dry skin.  I'll rub lotion in his head. That will help.  It didn't help.

Next day- He went to the nurse at school, thankfully she didn't send him home. I would have been horrified if he had lice! Of course this had been a few days, and I was worried about lice too, so pulled out my super awesome powerful gem magnifying glass, to look at my little boys scalp. Well, I didn't see anything moving around, and neither did the nurse, so no worries- RIGHT?

Next few days- Itchy, itchy scalp. Hmm
Okay, time for another trip to the store for the magic shampoo 'head and shoulders', wash rinse and repeat for an itchy scalp. Verdict - wha-wha-wha  Can you hear it? That's the sound of failure.

Next day - ITCHY (Bleeping) SCALP
Okay at this point I'm starting to suspect that it's a tic, and I need to learn to live with it.  So I ask.  Trying to be the patient mother of boy with Tourette's. Nope, I was almost hoping it was a tic, at least I would be able to ignore his itching.

So, here is where I start to get a little nuts, okay, I went slightly insane.  So you know how we diagnose everything via google, right? Well, I had just about ruled out all itchy scalp problems on the list, I was sure he had some rare disorder, that when from itchy scalp to death in a matter of days.  I know it was a bit of a jump, but I was at a loss, and Ian was clearly fed up.  He wasn't sleeping well, he as irritable and he just couldn't focus.  I took him into my bathroom and looked at his head, searching for a reasonable explanation.
WAIT, did I see something? No it was small, but it's not there anymore. Hmm, what are those little things on his hair? Could they be nits (lice eggs?)
Hold up- Mom needs to google some stuff, don't leave this bathroom!
At that point, I had a growing suspicion that, the nurse and myself had made a terrible mistake days ago.
One word... LICE
 After my quick research, a home remedy for lice was mouthwash, something I had, so, I poured the remainder of the bottle on his little head.
OH, MY AHHHH-  I saw a nasty bugger fleeing from his mouthwashy head, apparently lice do not like minty freshness!

Time for the frenzy - A haircut followed by a trip to the store for the shampoo, combs, and gloves.  10 million loads of laundry, vacuuming, cloroxing, disinfecting. Ian was treated to the royal, you have lice, you need to be burned and everything you own needs to go, treatment.  Despite my lack of maternal-ness, I hunkered down and began the treatment on every living human in the house. Shampooing, combing and watching. 
The verdict, Ian had lice, lots of 'um. I combed and combed his head till I found no more, then I combed some more.  My skin was crawling, but surprisingly, it must have all been in my mind because the rest of us were lice free.

The next morning - No ITCHING.
I still cleaned vacuumed, and combed that kids head till he cried. Like I said I really want that worst mother award. I'm still itching, but I don't think they have a pill for psychosomatic itching, and worry. So now we wait and watch for the next 7-10 days. Die - stupid parasitic bugs!

So, really, people get lice, no big deal. So far we are lucky that it was just Ian.  And now with hyper awareness mom, we are going to be on the lookout for any infestations.  Of course, Ian touches his head like 6 times a minute to tic, so that probably won't be the last time. But I'm reminded that it's treatable, and we know how to deal with it. Ugh, I just still feel Unclean.